''Earth calling Song Young-Keun!''

Rob Rosenberger, Vmyths co-founder
Monday, 31 May 2004 AN AFP NEWSWIRE breathlessly reports North Korea is unleashing "cyber-terror" on South Korea. I kid you not. Among the atrocities: North Korea runs eight official websites.

North Korea has messed around for decades with South Korea. What does South Korea's Defense Security Command fear most from North Korea? "100 hackers."

Believe it, folks. Operating a website qualifies as an act of cyber-terror. Quoting from the AFP newswire: "Song [Young-Keun, commanding general of South Korea's Defense Security Command] said there were eight Internet websites directly run by Pyongyang and 26 other sites operated by pro-Pyongyang organizations which are acting as propaganda outlets for the communist state. 'Combined efforts are necessary to cope with the mounting cyber attacks from North Korea as it is impossible for the DSC alone to cope with them,' the general said." Waitaminit. Only eight official websites in North Korea? Eight? EIGHT?!? Bah! The U.S. government pays thousands of cyber-terrorists to maintain HTML pages, you know. Vmyths takes a different view of North Korea's cyber-terror program. Study this satellite photo and ask yourself, "what's wrong with this picture?" Let's get something straight. North Korea has messed around for decades with South Korea; it's nothing new. They dug tunnels all along the demilitarized zone. They opened a heroin pipeline to Seoul. They harass fishing vessels in international waters. They offer a submarine shuttle service for clandestine agents. I could go on and on. But what does South Korea's Defense Security Command fear most from North Korea? "100 hackers." Not everybody buys into this, of course. I'll give the last word to someone who calls himself miliantnutcase: "This is priceless. I bet they have aol dial-up accounts. What are they going to dos-attack them with their cluster of 9.6k modems ;) All we would have to do is shut down the phone service coming out of the country..."